yesterday,

I strolled a park’s path, with my son, who was wild with running and pinecone spotting. I took a moment to look up at the trees towering around me and I breathed. The moment was intoxicating. I had the feeling that I was in the presence of something familiar. I felt the warm caress of a long ago love. It was the feeling of being reminded of a love affair but one I couldn’t quite remember, as though it was from a book, or play, or dream, or another life. There was no face to apply to the memory, or words, or visions. It was like a scent, faint and fleeting. It was a sensation that washed over me and it was the best I’d felt in so long. It was peace I suppose, or communion with my birth mother and lover: the earth. I can almost feel it now as I try to recall. But it feels more like longing. It feels more like the cells in my body reaching out for that sensation again. I look out the window now, notice a tree dancing in the breeze, and I breathe long and deep. I feel it, for a moment. My lover has come again.